Modesty
—Monday, June 21st, 1999
“Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.”
1 Peter 3:3,4
WHAT IS MODESTY?
When discussing social nudity with others, one of the most frequently voiced concerns is the importance of maintaining proper modesty. Given the traditional association of modesty with clothing, it would seem to invalidate the possibility of nudity ever being modest. Once modesty is more fully understood, however, it becomes easier to see how nudity fits well within the true spirit of modesty.
The Traditional Definition of Modesty
(Modesty as A Covering)
The traditional perception of modesty – by LDS members and the “moral majority” – is that modesty is about clothing. There is a general assumption that modesty may be achieved by covering certain parts of the body. The more the body that is covered, the more modest the clothing. Standards may vary from place to place and person to person as to how much needs to be covered, but the most common perception in regard to modesty follows this pattern.
More specifically, the Church teaches that we should not wear clothing that is likely to incite lust. This is important, and very correct. Unfortunately, it is frequently misinterpreted to mean that uncovering the body will naturally result in lust. People often assume that our bodies are inherently lustful in nature. They compulsively cover up under all circumstances – and then are mollified about their own modesty. But, this is simply a cop-out.
By doing this, our bodies are esteemed as inherently shameful. Regardless of righteousness and innocence, the uncovered body is thought to be in some way impure or unworthy. This ultimately denies the intrinsic goodness of the body’s creation. This was never the intention of our inspired leaders. They want us to avoid sin, not become the sin.
Some believe that we are literally dust, the lowest of all physical constructs and that God has NO physical substance whatsoever – merely an embodiment of spirit, intelligence, or energy. We believe otherwise. We are only figuratively created from the “dust” – a suitable euphemism for the elements that comprise our earthly bodies. Our bodies were divinely created and patterned after our Father in Heaven’s own form – a man similarly composed of flesh and bone.
Given their divine nature, our bodies should not be seen as shameful, impure or unworthy. Such is inconsistent with the Gospel. Modesty is important, but there has to be a clearer definition – one that does not deny the goodness and nobility of our creation.
More Enlightened Definitions of Modesty
First, we need to build on the basic premise that our bodies are good. We are created in the image of our divine parents – male and female. The bodies we were given are a blessing to us; enabling us to live, work, and even procreate. Our bodies are obviously not shameful to our Creator – nor should they be shameful to us.
Rather than inherent shame, there is inherent goodness in our bodies – and clothing neither adds to nor takes away from that goodness. When used in righteousness and in doing good, our bodies glorify our Father. When used inappropriately and for evil intent, therein lies the shame. In either case, it’s the righteousness or the evil that determines our joy or our shame – our body is only an accessory or a tool to performing our actions. Herein lies the most important aspect of modesty – that of behavior.
Modesty as Behavior
Modesty is a spiritual state of mind that is manifest in how we comport ourselves. It is an attitude that comes from within us – internalized before it is ever made external. If what we feel on the inside is modesty and purity, then that will show on the outside as well – by virtue of our actions and our demeanor. It may also be manifest in what we wear – but this is a far more subjective type of communication. Clothing is highly dependent on context and strongly influenced by cultural and other biases.
The clearest message of modesty is in our actions and mannerisms. This is more objective, and more reliable in the long run. Your intentions are clarified through your conduct better than any clothing can convey. While modest clothing can present a subjective picture of modesty, actions tell the rest of the story. If a picture is worth a thousand words, your actions are worth a thousand pictures. When you are modest, you have the Spirit of modesty about you – something that a picture cannot reliably convey.
Modesty as A Form of Reserve
Behavioral modesty can also be said to be a form of reserve. Sexual modesty is, therefore, sexual reserve – making yourself unavailable to sexual interests. There is a time and a place for attractiveness – it plays a large part in finding your celestial mate. Sensuality combined with attractiveness is very appropriate in marital intimacy.
Modesty in the presence of others is important. When you are not sexually available to them, and you are not looking for a mate, it is wise to be clear about your intentions. You can communicate this modesty by behaving in a sexually reserved manner – presenting yourself as unavailable to that type of intimacy. You manifest this unavailability in your body language, your speech, your actions, and even in your choice of clothing. There is no flirtation, or sensuality directed towards others – regardless of how attractive you may appear to them (through their eyes). The sensual, sexual expressions of availability are reserved for your mate.
Modesty as Reverence
Another aspect of behavioral modesty is reverence toward the human body. For LDS members, this should be obvious: We esteem with reverence the bodies that we were given as a part of the Plan of Salvation. Of all our body’s parts and functions, there is no greater dignity and DIVINITY than in the parts used for procreation. Through these, we are given the power to participate in the creation process. This gift is not to be taken lightly, nor is it something of which we should be ashamed. Reverence for this power (and the tools thereof) is appropriate. Similarly, we respect a woman’s physical capacity to feed her child through her own breasts. We regard this ability with reverence, and certainly not with shame.
Shame or fear of the body is not reverent, nor is it appropriate. Reverence comes from understanding – it is something we teach our children. We teach them not to speak inappropriately of the body – not to make light of it or desecrate it through jokes or sexually explicit stories. We teach them to avoid pornography, and avoid various forms of self-abuse. Informed parents will also teach their children not to criticize or compare the bodies of others. This helps combat a culture obsessed with body-perfection. It teaches our children to look at people on the inside, rather than judging them by their outward appearance.
Modesty as Humility
When we are truly modest, we are also humble. We do not glorify ourselves or try to appear better than others. We esteem others as ourselves. On the surface, this appears hard to do in our modern society. Everyone is judged by what they wear, where they live, what they drive, etc. A person’s social and economic status is readily apparent in how they dress. Removing that status is no easy thing.
In social nudity, setting aside status is almost automatic. Nudity is the great equalizer of persons. When naked, there is no status. There are only people. You simply are who you are – without pretense, façade, mask, or costume. If that condition is coupled with modest behavior, it clearly bespeaks humility. It is an honest and unpretentious state of being. It sets others at ease and helps us to simply be ourselves.
Whether nude or not, humility is behavioral, not material. Humility is an attitude. The verses in 1 Peter 3:3,4 (see the top of this document) aptly describe humility as a behavior and attitude when describing how we should adorn ourselves. It reads, “…let it be the hidden man of the heart.” This “hidden man” (as opposed to the hidden BODY of the man – or woman), is what counts most in humility.
This scripture does not promote nudity, but neither does it bestow any great measure of humility or modesty upon mere clothing. On the contrary, it defies vanity in adornment by saying it should be “the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit”. Meekness is inherent to a naked state of being – it’s more inherently meek than most fashionable clothing.
Peter was not trying to say that we shouldn’t dress nicely or attractively though. He was merely describing modesty and humility – disassociating them from our clothing. If we have a meek and humble spirit, that will also be apparent in our clothing. That humble spirit goes with us everywhere. It is present day and night, and it doesn’t leave us when we are unclothed – nor when we are elegantly dressed.
Nudity as A Form of Modesty
So far, I have discussed alternate ways to describe modesty. There is nothing revolutionary about this, once you realize that these descriptions can apply equally in clothed or unclothed situations. The idea that I want to convey is that social nudity – meaning nudity in the presence of others (all ages and genders) – is not inherently immodest. It is merely subject to the circumstances or context in which the nudity occurs.
Nudism is modest when the Behavior is modest; when there is a Form of Reserve towards those of the opposite gender; when there is a quiet Reverence toward the bodies of others; when a Humble spirit is present. In the absence of these elements, there is no guarantee of modesty – no matter how well covered you may be. In fact, there are ways in which nudism is inherently MORE humble and reverent than when dressed up. I explore this phenomenon in greater detail elsewhere in my writings, but for now consider the following example:
On Mount Horeb, the Lord said to Moses, “…put off thy shoes from off thy feet, for the place whereon thou standest is holy ground.” (Exodus 3:5) Here we see reverence enacted by virtue of removing an item of clothing – in this case, Moses’ shoes. Was it because his man-made shoes were not worthy to touch the holy ground? If so, what else might have been removed? It’s an interesting point to ponder – How much holiness is there in clothes made by the hand of man?
The clothing we wear is inconsequential to our divine mission. It neither adds nor takes away from the purpose and intent of our mortal bodies. Scriptural references to clothing are mostly allegorical to spiritual clothing. When we come to this realization, it helps us overcome traditional, mythical, and archaic attitudes about nudity. If we dare to put social nudity to the test, we discover that the anxiety about nudity quickly vanishes. Fear is replaced by understanding. Fear loses its perceived power over us.
Fear is something that only has value in the overcoming of it. Some say the opposite of fear is love. Others say the opposite of fear is understanding. I think it maybe both. If we love our children, we will not hide good things from them – but we will bestow upon all good things (bodies included) the reverence and respect they deserve. Through this will come knowledge and understanding. We are here to gain knowledge – and when coupled with the understanding we are prepared to use that knowledge righteously. Knowledge (including with regard to our bodies) is only as good as the righteousness that results from it.
“Wherefore, we shall have a perfect knowledge of all our guilt, and our uncleanness and our [spiritual] nakedness; and the righteous shall have a perfect knowledge of their enjoyment, and their righteousness, being [spiritually] clothed with purity, yea, even with the robe of righteousness.” (2 Nephi 9:14)
My hope is to associate with those who are unconcerned about being physically naked and more concerned about wearing the “robe of righteousness.” There are those out there who understand both of these concepts, and there are many more who can benefit from learning them. I hope to find such people.
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